Intro Adventures

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The Intro Comics

The Intro Adventures are a series of tutorial adventures designed to introduce new players to the game.

History

The Intro Adventures were introduced to the game on June 26, 2009.

They were well-received by the HoboWars community.

Story

You are an average employee at WalMart who dreams of becoming a hobo. After your boss catches you exhibiting hobo-like behavior on the job multiple times, he becomes fed up with it and fires your ass. You leave WalMart, dragging a cardboard box from the store behind you. You find an alleyway and decide to take a nap there in your cardboard box for a while. Upon waking up, you notice that your cardboard box is gone! All that's left is a note that reads, "I have your box. If you ever want to see it again, meet Duncan on the South Side of the City. -The Old Man".

It would seem that your life as a hobo has gotten off to a rough start...

Initiation

All new players are forced to go through the Intro Adventures. Therefore, upon creating an account, a new player will automatically be introduced to the Intro Comics and directed to the City.

All players present before the introduction of the Intro Adventures have the option of starting them or opting out of them via a notification in the City. Be warned though... If you choose to opt out of the Intro Adventures, you will never again be presented with the option to start them, so, choose wisely.


Tasks

The Intro Adventures consist of tasks. Completing a task progresses you further through the Intro Adventures.

The First Task

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Visit Duncan's House and get some free stuff!

The note the Old Man left you said to visit Duncan's House on the South Side of the City. Therefore, it is probably in your best interest to head on over there.

If you are not already at the City, you should take a moment to look at all of the links on the game's standard page layout. If you are observant, you should find two links to the City—one on the red menu bar near the top of the page, and one on the sidebar near the left side of the page. Clicking either one will send you to the City.

Once you are at the City, take a second to look at its layout. The City has four sides: North, West, East, and South. Fortunately, each side of the City is logically positioned on the page, so, finding the South Side shouldn't be too difficult. Once you have found the South Side, locate Duncan's House and click it.

Upon entering Duncan's House you immediately ask Duncan where your cardboard box is, and he tells you that it was taken by the Old Man, a tough homeless guy who runs the City. Duncan then tells you that you need to prove yourself to the Old Man in order to get your cardboard box back, and proceeds to give you five Donator Days to help you do just that.

Reward: 5 Donator Days

The Second Task

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Explore the City and come back with 20 Cans.

This is not that difficult of a task; you just need to figure out how to explore the City.

Now, Duncan told you that you need $10 for a map of the City. You need that map if you want to explore the City. You will be able to purchase the map once you get to the place where you can do this activity; however, before we get there, let's make sure that you have $10 on hand. If you just started playing, you should already have $10 on hand. If you do not, then you will have to go to your Piggy Bank and withdraw $10. There are two links to your Piggy Bank—one on the sidebar and one on the City page. (In fact, almost all of the important links you need are on the left-hand sidebar of the game's standard page layout.) Find a link to your Piggy Bank and click it to go to your Piggy Bank. Once you are there, find the "Withdraw" field, type the amount you want to withdraw in its text box, and click the "Withdraw" button in order to withdraw that amount from your Piggy Bank.

Once you have at least $10 on hand, it is time to go explore the City. There are two links to this activity—you guessed it, one on the left-hand sidebar and one on the City page. Once you find one of those two links, click it, and you will go to the page where you can explore the City. Once there, purchase your City map by clicking the first link on that page. Now that you have your map, you can explore the City! To begin your exploration, click the big "Explore City!" link.

All you need to know about exploring the City is here. Read up.

Once you are finished, head back to Duncan's House to receive your reward and your next task!

Reward: $400

The Third Task

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Buy a weapon from the Toy Store and equip it.

Another simple task; you just need to purchase a weapon and equip it.

Upon completing the last task, you should have around $600 in your Piggy Bank. If you do not have have $400 already on hand, then go to your Piggy Bank and withdraw $400 from it. Once you have $400 on hand, head on over to the Toy Store. There is a link to it on the City page, on the South Side. Once you are at the Toy Store, find a Paper Cup and buy it. Congratulations! You just purchased your first weapon. Now you just need to equip it. To accomplish this, head over to your Living Area, find the "View List" link, and click it. You will go to a page that lists all of your weapons and pieces of armor. Find your Paper Cup and click the "Equip" link near it in order to equip it.

Head on over to Duncan's House to receive your next task!

PROTIP:
Now, if you are observant, you will notice that there is not a link to the Toy Store on left-hand sidebar. Now, it should be said that you can add and remove links from that sidebar. In order to do this, you need to go to your preferences page. This can be accomplished in many ways, but, the easiest way would be to go to your Living Area, click the "More Info" tab, find the "Account settings and profile" link, and click it. Once there, find the "Layout Selection" link and click it. Scroll down until you reach the "Side Menu Options" section. Take a close look at the list presented to you. This list will grow bigger as you play the game, so be sure to check it often to see if more locations are added to it. Now, simply check the box of any location you want to be added to the sidebar. The following are recommended additions for new players: WalMart, Suicide Hill, High School, University, Duncan's House, Toy Store, Corner 7/11, Casino, SGHM, Rats, Backpack, Arcade, and Arena. Of course, you can check them all if you want; just don't expect to be able to go to all of those locations immediately. Once you have made your selections, click the "Change" button under the list. The sidebar should be updated.

The Fourth Task

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Start a fight with another hobo!

This task requires you to fight another player, and it does not matter if you win or lose that fight. That's not too hard, right?

With your handy-dandy weapon equipped, go to the City, find the "Hobo Meeting Area" link, and click it in order to go to the page where you can battle other players. (Alternatively, you can click the "Battle" links on the top menu bar or the sidebar.) Once there, either click the "List hobos around your level who are alive" link or scroll down to the bottom to view the Hobo Rankings. Find a name and click on it to go to that player's profile.

Now, once you are on that player's profile page, recall the advice that Duncan gave you:

1. Attacking other players uses your Awake. When your Awake gets to zero you'll have to wait for more, so use it wisely!
2. You can't attack or be attacked if your Life is at zero. Go to the Hospital to recover from your injuries.
3. Remember to put your cash in your Piggy Bank before attacking, in case you lose!

Quickly make sure that you have at least 5 Awake, are alive, and don't have any money on hand. If all of those criteria are met, then go ahead and click the "Attack Hobo" link near the top of that player's profile. Once you have done so, you will go to a page that shows you the battle report of that battle. Check it to see if you won or lost the battle, and, regardless of the outcome, head back to Duncan's House to receive your next task.

The Fifth Task

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Raise up any stat to 5 or more.

Now, this task could take a while to do, because you are bound to run out of Awake while performing this task. If you do, just wait patiently or find something else to do while it regenerates.

Duncan wants you to head on over to the Primary School and train one of your stats to at least 5. Before you head on over there, go to your Piggy Bank and withdraw $20 so that you can pay for the enrollment fee.

Once you have enrolled in Primary School, you will be able to train your stats. Take a look at the list of activities you can do at the Primary School and see which stat each activity increases. Next, decide which stat you want to raise to 5 and click on its corresponding activity to raise it.

If you are having trouble deciding on which stat to train to 5 first, here's a quick breakdown of what each stat does:

Speed determines how often you hit your opponent.
Power greatly increases the damage you deal to others.
Strength decreases the damage dealt to you and slightly increases the damage you deal to others.
Intelligence has a variety of non-combat benefits. For example, the higher your intelligence, the more stats you'll gain when you train.

Keep training that stat until you either run out of Awake or reach 5 of that stat. If you run out of Awake, you will simply have to wait for more.

Once you have raised your selected stat to 5, head on over to Duncan's House to receive your reward and your next task!

Possible Rewards: $500 / Slurpee Cup / Garbage Bag / $500 & Slurpee Cup & Garbage Bag

The Sixth Task

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Go to WalMart, defeat the Trolly Boy, and steal his trolly!

All right. In this task you need to kick the Trolly Boy's ass. You can find him at WalMart, which is on the East Side of the City. In order to attack him, you must have at least 5 Awake, so, if you don't have any Awake, you'll have to wait a little bit before attacking him.

Now, the Trolly Boy isn't really that strong. He has 5 speed, 5 power, and 5 strength, meaning that his average damage is 8 and his average defense is 2. If you are having trouble defeating him, take a look at the battle report resulting from your fight with him, and analyze it:

If your hits are missing your opponent, you are not powerful enough. Train power.
If your opponent's hits damage you too much and you die quickly, you are not strong enough. Train strength.
If you are not getting any hits in at all, you are not fast enough. Train speed.

Also, besides training stats, you can also buy and equip better weapons and pieces of armor to help you win battles. For example, if you received a Slurpee Cup, a Garbage Bag, or both from the last task, make sure that they are equipped. If you do not have any armor, buy a Plastic Bag from the Toy Store for $400, or, if you have enough money, a Paper Bag for $1,600, and equip it.

In the end, if you are having trouble defeating the Trolly Boy, you just need to train your stats at the Primary School or equip better equipment; there is no special trick or hidden way to defeat him.

Once you have defeated the Trolly Boy and have stolen his Trolly, return to Duncan's House to receive your next task.

Reward: Trolly

The Seventh Task

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Explore the East Side of the City!

This is a pretty simple task. Just check out the East Side of the City.

As you are exploring the East Side of the City, you will soon realize that a lot of locations have level requirements.

Here is a list of them:

You need to be level 5 before you can access the Arcade.
You need to be level 7 before you can visit the Corner 7/11.
You need to be level 10 before you can gain entry to the High School.
You need to be level 12 before you can enter the Casino.
You need to be level 15 before you can go to Suicide Hill and access CSCR.

The only locations on the East Side without any level requirements are the Gangs Alley, WalMart, and the SuperGlobalHyperMart.

Once you have visited every location on the East Side, head back to Duncan's House to receive your next task.

Reward: Hobo Stew

The Eighth Task

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Head over to the Arcade, defeat the Arcade Kid, and erase his his high score!

Your main goal for this task is to erase the scores of the Space Invaders game in the Arcade. In order to do that, you must first defeat the Chubby Arcade Kid who is glued to the machine.

First, before you can access the Arcade, you need to level up to level 5. To accomplish this, simply attack other players you think you can beat and defeat them to receive experience. Now, this might take a while to do, unless you join a gang, which is highly recommended. Good gangs can provide you with awesome equipment and guidance, along with other great benefits.

Once you are level 5, head on over to the Arcade and fight the Chubby Arcade Kid. If you lose, analyze the fight's battle report and train your stats accordingly. If it helps, the Chubby Arcade Kid is believed to have somewhere around 15 speed, 15 power, and 15 strength, meaning that his average speed is 9, average damage is 12, and average defense is 6.

After you have defeated the Chubby Arcade Kid, step over him to gain access to the games in the Arcade. Look for the Space Invaders game listed under "Our Games" and click it. Upon doing so, you automatically unplug the machine and plug it back it, erasing all of its high scores in the process. Success!

Return to Duncan's House to receive your reward and your next task.

Reward: Beggar's Bouillon

The Ninth Task

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Raise your begging stat above 3!

Your task this time is to head on over to the Corner 7/11 and beg there until your begging stat is 3.

However, before you can beg at the Corner 7/11, you need to do two things first.

First, you need to make sure that you are level 7; hopefully, by now you should be familiar with the basics of battling other players. If you find that you are taking a long time to gain the experience required to level up, try attacking higher-leveled players. Generally, the higher-leveled a player is, the more experience you'll get upon defeating them. Also, you might want to pay attention to a player's win percentage. If a player has a low win percentage, you will not gain a whole lot of experience from defeating them. On the flip side, if a player has a high win percentage, you will gain a lot of experience from defeating them. Therefore, try to avoid attacking players with low win percentages and instead try to attack players with mid-range win percentages or high win percentages.

Once you are level 7, you are able to visit the Corner 7/11. However, just as you walk up to the store, you see a certain Trolly Boy throwing rocks at the store's windows. He's a little butthurt about the whole ass-whooping, trolly-stealing ordeal that you put him through, and is now taking it out on the store. You won't be able to beg at the Corner 7/11 until you kick his ass—again.

Don't be surprised if you lose when you go to attack him; he's become stronger since the last time you faced him. As always, if you are having trouble defeating someone, train your stats! It is believed that he has somewhere around 15 speed, 18 power, and 27 strength, meaning that his average speed is 9, average damage is 16, and average defense is 11. If you want, you can also level up a bit and increase your max life in order to last longer during the fight; contrary to popular belief, the Trolly Boy does not become stronger when you level up. This used ot be the case, but it no longer is.

Once you have crushed the Trolly Boy for the second time, you are free to beg at the Corner 7/11!

...

What exactly is begging, you ask? Excellent question!

So far, what you have been doing up to this point—training and battling—is considered fighting. Through fighting, you become stronger and stronger, being able to defeat stronger opponents as time goes on. Fighting is dynamic and challenging, and requires a lot of planning and dedication. As you progress through the game, new gameplay elements will become available to you, and more combat strategies and tactics will be at your disposal. Overall, fighting is fun and exciting, and comes with a lot of prestige.

Now, begging is basically the polar opposite from fighting. Instead of training and battling other players, you simply sit down and beg passersby for money. It is much simpler than fighting and requires more persistence than dedication, since raising your begging stat takes much longer than raising your combat stats. The begging mechanic isn't expanded upon very much as you progress through the game either. However, that doesn't mean that begging is not worthwhile; if you choose to consistently beg, or, "go beggar", as it it called, you will soon find yourself with a lot of money. Although your gains will start out low and slow, over time they will grow and grow. Overall, begging is simple and slow, and comes with a lot of wealth.

Whenever you go to beg, which usually costs 10T, you will get the results of your begging session, which includes information on your money, begging stat, and, eventually, experience gains.

Money gains are, obviously, your monetary gains from begging, and is also known as begging income. The higher your hobo's level, intelligence stat, and begging stat, the higher your money gains from begging.
Begging stat gains are your gains to your begging stat from begging. Your begging stat is the foundation to everything begging-related in the game; it basically reflects how skilled you are at begging. In general, the higher your begging stat, the higher your money gains and begging stat gains from begging.
Experience gains are your gains to your experience from begging, meaning that your hobo can ultimately gain levels through begging. At first, you will not gain any experience from begging. In order to gain experience from begging, you must first upgrade your begging level, which can only be done once your begging stat reaches a certain amount and you have enough money for the upgrade. The higher your hobo's level and begging level, the higher your experience gains from begging.

It is important to note that the money you received from a begging session goes directly into your hand, not into your Piggy Bank, meaning that, if you are alive, other players can attack you and steal half of it! Therefore, be sure to bank it as quickly as possible! Also note that if you beg while you are not alive, your money gains will be penalized, and you will not gain any experience.

If you desire more information on begging, please look here.

Now that you have learned the basics of begging, go ahead and give it a whirl. It might help to consume the Beggar's Bouillon you recently received from Duncan before you start begging, since it gives you a permanent 0.5 begging stat gain upon consumption. To give you an idea of how significant that gain is, here is a comparison of how much Awake it would roughly take to raise your begging stat from 2.0 and 2.5 to 3.0:

From 2.0 to 3.0: 790T, roughly 8 bars of Awake.
From 2.5 to 3.0: 380T, roughly 4 bars of Awake.

As you can see, by consuming the Beggar's Bouillon beforehand, you save yourself around 400T!

Once you your begging stat is 3, head back to Duncan's House to receive your reward and your next task.

Reward: $1,500

The Tenth Task

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Enroll in High School!

Compared to the last task, this one is a piece of cake.

All you need to do is level up to level 10 and enroll in High School. The enrollment fee is $300, so, make sure you have that much money on hand when you go to enroll.

The High School is basically a quicker, better version of the Primary School. Although each training session at the High School costs 10T and $20, the stat gain from spending 10T and $20 at the High School is greater than the total stat gain from spending 5T twice at the Primary School. Therefore, if you have the money, start training at the High School from now on.

Once you are enrolled, return to Duncan's House to receive your next task.

The Eleventh Task

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Bust Sven's kneecaps over at the Casino!

In this task Duncan tells you that the Old Man wants you to bust the kneecaps of someone who owes him money.

The guy you need to take care of, Sven, is located over at the Casino. However, you must be level 12 before you can get in there, so level up to level 12.

Once you are level 12, head on over to the Casino. Once you get in, you need to search around for Sven.

The Casino features four games of chance that you can play: slots, blackjack, Texas hold'em-style poker, and lottos.

Mosey on over here for more information on the Casino's featured games of chance!

If you head over to the blackjack tables, you'll find Sven sitting at one of them. Apparently, he got into a bicycle accident and both of his legs are in casts! Unfortunately, this means that you really can't bust up his kneecaps; fortunately, Sven agrees to write a note saying that you were the one who broke his knees.

He gives you the Note from Sven and you place it into your Unusually Large Backpack.

The Unusually Large Backpack is the place where you store special items such as the note you just obtained. You can view the contents of your backpack either by clicking the "Unusually Large Backpack" link in your Living Area, the "Backpack" side menu link, or the backpack icon near the upper right-hand corner of the game's standard page layout.

Sometimes some of the backpack items you obtain are usable. For example, if you go to your backpack and use the Note from Sven, you will be able to read the contents of the note that Sven wrote for you:

Ow ow OWWW! Please don't break my leg Mr. Hobo! OWWWW You broke it!
Oh nooo now you're breaking the other one!!! OWWWWWWIIIEEEEE!!!
I can't believe you broke both of my legs!!! Now how will I ever walk?
Sincerely,
Sven

With the Note from Sven in your possession, head back to Duncan's House to... be directed to give the note to the Bouncer in the Corner 7/11 alleyway.

Head over to the Corner 7/11 alleyway to claim your reward from the Bouncer, and then head back to Duncan's House to receive your next task.

Reward: $3,000

The Twelfth Task

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Do some cart racing over at Suicide Hill!

Your next task is to head over to Suicide Hill, buy a racing cart and some cart parts, and participate in a shopping cart race.

However, before you can head over to Suicide Hill, you must be level 15.

Once you are level 15, head on over to Suicide Hill and gaze upon the magnificent green mountain.


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The first thing you need to do is head on over to Pete's Garage and buy a shopping cart to race in. It is recommended that you buy the Walmart Cart for 500 tokens using the 1,000 tokens you start out with.

Next, head on over to Pete's Parts and buy some parts for your cart. It's up to you how you'd like to spend the rest of your tokens on cart parts, but, it is recommended that you just buy a Shell C-20 for 500 tokens, using up the rest of the tokens you have left, that is, if you bought the Walmart Cart. You can buy a Motor and Wheels for your shopping cart later once you've acquired some more tokens from racing.

Once you've bought your shopping cart and cart parts, head on over to Your Garage. You should see your New Cart ready to be named and used for racing. Go ahead and name your shopping cart, and, once you've named it, select it for use in shopping cart races. Now that you've designated a shopping cart to use for racing, you can now equip it with cart parts. To do this, click the name of your cart and then change the parts that are currently equipped to it. Select the part you want equipped, and you will equip it to your cart. Repeat this process until all of the parts you have are equipped. Keep in mind that you can only equip one of each cart part type to your cart at a time.

Now that your cart is ready for racing, head on over to Dirty Greg's Wrecker and sign up for a race. Signing up for a race uses up a ticket. You get six tickets every reset to use for signups, and once they're gone, you'll have to wait until next reset to get more. Also, races are run once every 30 minutes, and you can't sign up for a race around a 30-minute mark, such as 10:30 AM or 1:00 PM, because races are being run during that time.

Wait until a 30-minute mark passes and you receive a notification in your Living Area letting you know how you did in the race. Since this was your first race, you probably didn't do very well. Don't be dismayed though, for if you continue racing, you will acquire more tokens to use for upgrades, and, once you start winning races, you will eventually be able to advance to the next racing class, where you will earn more tokens per race!

The final thing you need to do at Suicide Hill is get yourself a sponsor. Head on over to City Advertising and select 7/11 as your sponsor. Once you let them sponsor you, you will receive 50 tokens every day. As a beginning racer, you'll need all the support you can get!

After you've completed all of these tasks, head back to Duncan's House and Duncan will give you access to the West Side of the City.

The Thirteenth Task

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Another simple task. Just check out the West Side of the City.

There is only one location on the West Side that has a level requirement:

You need to be level 20 before you can go to the University.

Although the rest of the locations on the West Side don't have any level requirements, there are few locations that you won't be able to much with at this point in the game:

You won't be able to raise rats until you buy a rat cage and capture a rat in it.
You won't be able to buy anything from the In-N-Out until you acquire some Food Stamps.
You won't be able to access the Skill Shop until later on in the game.
You won't stand a chance in the UFC until you've become a formidable and powerful fighter.

Once you have visited every location on the West Side, head back to Duncan's House to receive your next task.

The Fourteenth Task

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Starting to get the hang of the gang? Great! But if you are going to survive in this game we're going to have to train you to play without a step by step guide for the rest of the game. So you're going to have to start doing a little common sense thinking.

The task is simple: Buy a rat cage and capture a rat!

The task starts at Duncan's. He tells you to visit the Pet Shop. Getting the cage once you get to their is simple. Then you need to capture a rat. If you was paying attention, you'll notice the rat roulette wheel in the Pet Shop too, right? Piece of cake!

Rats are used in a number of parts of the game, so it might be worthwhile to check out the RATS wiki page when you get a chance to see what they can all give you!

The Fifteenth Task

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Task at hand: Get the Huge In-N-Out Order and deliver it to the Old Man!

Before you read on, try doing this task by yourself. This task is simple enough you shouldn't need any help, but in case you do...


Go to the In-N-Out store on the west side. You are given two options. Either option can work, you just have to click, click, and click some more if you decide to wait. If you do decide to take the quicker option, you will have to fight another NPC like the trolly boy. Just be sure you are alive before you try.

Once you have the huge In-N-Out order, you need to take it to... Forget already?

Deliver the order and receive your Reward: $5,000

The Sixteenth Task

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Task to complete: Break the Young Man out of jail!

This task helps you learn how to complete adventure quests. Follow the instructions on where to go and what to do, and you'll make it through just fine!


Start at the The Big House where you meet the Young Man, who sends you to ________ to get the Hacksaw. After getting that, you are sent to _______ to get a "pie".

Remember what everyone was calling the Hacksaw? "Pie filling" You have to fill your pie with the pie filling. To do this, go to your backpack and click on your Hacksaw. Some items, like the hacksaw, have actions associated with them. So whenever you need to use an item, you normally would do it from your backpack.

So now you have your filled pie, head on back over to the Young Man. The rest of the task is just following along. Check back with Duncan when you are done to get your prize!

Reward: Hacksaw

The Seventeenth Task

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Task: Gain Access to the Arena!

In case you missed it, Duncan tells you how to start this task on the bottom of the screen after you receive your hacksaw.

There is no one place to obtain the item you need as it changes coordinates randomly. Most people normally find it within 10 to 15 turns, so don't fret if you don't find it super fast.

Once you obtain the item, you'll notice the text in the Corner 7/11 change to say "Visit the Arena" Every day at AM reset, the arena pass item expires and you have to re-find it again if you want to get back in. The way you can tell if you have the arena pass or not is by the wording of the text.

So you have the pass, now it's time to finally meet the Old Man and get your box back! Too bad he's not ready to give it back yet...


The Eighteenth Task

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Task: Defeat three Arena opponents!

Before you can fight the old man, you need to unlock him. To unlock him, you have to defeat all 14 NPCs before him. For this task though, you only need to defeat the first three. Once you defeat one, a harder NPC becomes available.

You can attack any NPC as many times as you wish. You will gain rewards every time you win, so there is some benefit to doing this if you want. For complete information about what awaits you at the arena, you should |check out the arena wiki page

After defeating 3 different opponents, the Old Man gives you a pat on the back and turns you into his little errand boy. Lucky you...

The Nineteenth Task

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Task: Deliver a Flaming bag of something awful to the front step of Bernard's Mansion!

If you ever want that cardboard box back, you'll just have to play along for now and do the Old Man's little errand. Obtain the Foul Smelling Bag and the Single match and Match book from the Old Man, head on over to Bernard's Mansion and complete your task.

Bernard's Mansion is located on the north side of the city. Clear out the thugs however you want, light the bag with the match (cough)Backpack(cough), plant the burning Flaming bag of something awful at Bernard's and watch the fun commence!

Okay, so it's not really all that interesting, but it gets the job done for the Old Man and you can finally get on with your hobo career!

The Old Man rewards you by having Duncan give you a Bus Pass which gets you access to the Short Bus and Second City where you can begin the Second City Adventures. This also concludes the Intro Adventures and you now have access to all locations in the city!


The Final Task

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But wait, you still didn't get your Cardboard Box back. Or did you forget in all the excitement...

Final Task: Defeat the Old Man!

Defeat every NPC in the arena up to the Old Man. This is NO EASY TASK, and will take training your hobo's fighting stats. The Old Man is rumored to have well over 25,000 battle stats! Take a breathe, that is why this is an optional task.

You can always complete this task at a (much later) date. The option to attack the Old Man will always be available to you, so once you have defeated all of the Old Man's flunkies and built up your hobo's stats, take him down!!!

If you defeat the Old Man, you get your Cardboard Box back, which really doesn't do anything anyways. For now, it's just a keep-sake, but don't let that stop you. Who knows what lays ahead down the road...